she laughs too easily and cries too hard

i have come back to this same spot again. its funny the little habits we get into. ever day i come to this same spot, stand the same place, to study a girl. she is either very self conscious, or she has a strong, self assured, quiet, confidence. she is young. i want to know how she got here. why she is the way she is. why she stands this way, dresses like that; why does she smile so big? her eyes are clear, as though she has just seen the direction she wants to go, and even knows how to get there, but still has the pleasure of the uncertanty of what she might find at the end. how will she end? will she be missed? she coveres her face, but i can still see right through her. she is not shy, she is unsure.
she stares. at me. why wont she turn away? i look at her. study her hard. she stares. she is in my way. she doesnt move. if i were a better person, id ask her what was wrong. there seems to be something wrong. her brown eyes follow my on eye-line. she traces my frame with her eyes. she knows somthing i dont. she stares. i still am unsure if i should ask her her name; if i should introduce myself, or simply walk away. do i hold her and tell her to stop crying? do i walk past like i dont notice? she smiles through her tears. do i smile back, or am i already smiling and she is smiling back at me? we step towards each other. she doesnt say a word. neither do i. she is short, brown hair; she is wearing jeans- the same as mine. she brushes the hair out of eyes. i can see her clearly now. i recognise her- she is hurt. she is happy. right now, i like her. shes a friend. though, there are times when i just want to smash her. but they say thats seven years bad luck.

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